


Analyzing you

by liuzzia



Category: Actor RPF, British Actor RPF, Real Person Fiction, Tom Hiddleston - Fandom
Genre: Cheating, Denial, Dirty Talk, F/M, Friendship, Making Love, Sex, Stalking, affair, psychiatrist, some mental health, some oral sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-11
Updated: 2018-11-12
Packaged: 2019-01-16 00:55:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 22,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12332250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/liuzzia/pseuds/liuzzia
Summary: Jennah Sibley is a woman in her 20's and she goes to see a psychiatrist, Tom Hiddleston. He's not the way he seems but she's not honest either.





	1. Chapter 1

My name is Jennah Sibley and I’m 24 years old. I’m 5’7” and my hair is brown. My eyes are brown. My clothing style is feminine. I own a clothes shop with my friend Clara Simons in the central of London. It’s a great success so we have hired a few employees. I’m usually a happy person but lately, I’ve felt deeply depressed. I’ve achieved a lot but still, it felt something was missing. I had my share of dates but that wasn’t the problem. I saw an advert in the newspaper about a psychiatrist so I made an appointment. With a false name of course. I told Clara where I was going. We told each other everything. She was like the sister I ever had. It was actually her who suggested I would go.

I get off work one hour earlier. I have my work clothes which always was a skirt and a blouse. Both of ears are pierced. My hair is in a ponytail. I usually wore glasses but now I had my contacts on. I arrive at a tall building with at least 12 floors. The office was on the 10th. I take the elevator. There are people on the floor when I arrive. It’s a long hall with a big window at the end of it. I look at the names on the doors. There were a lot of different offices. I’m quite early so I take my time. I take my mobile from my purse and look at the time. There was still 5 minutes left. I stop by a dark brown door and look at the name before entering. “Dr T. Hiddleston”  
I knock on the door lightly and step in. I get to another room and see a female secretary by a medium-sized desk. She looks up at me and smiles. I close the door and get to her. I tell her my name and she tells me to sit down on the couch by the wall close to the door I just came in from. Behind her, there’s another big window. The street is being seen from it. The whole room is quite big. There’s a plant in the corner of the couch. In front of it, there’s a small table with magazines on it. I’m too nervous to look through one. I see another door in front of me with the same name. I look at the clock that hangs above the door. It was soon time. I’m never been to a psychiatrist before.  
“The doctor is a bit late with his schedule so it will take a little more time” The secretary says to me  
That didn’t help my nervousness at all. I hold tight of my purse and look at my hands. My heart is beating fast. Suddenly the door opens which startles me.  
“Jennah Sidney”

I look up and gasp. A tall and gorgeous man with bright blue eyes stands in front of me. I slowly get up and almost stare at him. He’s wearing a light blue shirt with the first button undone and black pants. His deep voice hypnotizes me so I almost forget why I was there. He tells me to come in and I do so. Before getting in himself, he tells his secretary she can leave for the day. The room was bright and it had the same window like in the hall and in the waiting room. As soon as you came into the office, there was a long desk with a laptop on it. In front of it, there’s a chair. In the corner to the left, there’s a small bookcase with books in it. A couch is in the right corner. I’m not as nervous as before.  
“Please sit down” He says and gets behind his desk  
I sit down on the chair and put my purse on the floor beside it. He takes a notepad and pencil from his drawer. He says something to me but I don’t hear. I’m too concentrated on him. I hoped he wouldn’t notice. I would never have guessed when I read the advert that he would be this handsome. If I didn’t stop this fantasizing, I would never get through this process.


	2. Chapter 2

“So Jennah, tell me why you’re here”  
I get out of my thoughts and reply. But it wasn’t the way I wanted it to.  
“I have this thing. I don’t know what to call it. Let’s say, I always want someone I can’t have” I look down on my hands and then look up at him  
I was here for my depression and now when he was in front of me, my mind went blank. Oh, why did he have to look like that? He looked at me but he had no idea what I actually felt.  
“Has this been for a long time or is this something that has happened recently?”  
I hadn’t planned this at all so I made up as I went along.  
“Well, I guess it’s been like that since I was a teenager”  
“How was your childhood? Was it happy?” He looks at me and then writes something on his notepad while waiting for my reply  
“It’s was good. My parents were together at the time” I keep looking at him “I had a good relationship with my brothers too”  
He looks up at me again. I bite my lower lip and try to flirt with him but he didn’t seem to notice.  
“When did your parents divorce?”  
“When I was 17”  
“OK. That might have made some effect. How did you take it?”  
“Fairly good. I understood their reason” I was getting good at this making up thing but I hated lying  
He writes something in his notepad again. I opened my blouse a little. It had suddenly got very hot in the room. He looks up from his writing. He paid no attention to what I was trying to do.  
“What kind of social circle do you have? Any problems there?”  
“No, I’ve always had a lot of friends. Actually, I have a store with my friend. We were friends since preschool”  
“That’s nice” He smiles

I could just have fainted. This man was perfect. I had to control myself so I wouldn’t do something I’d regret later. His secretary had gone home for the day so the temptation was too great. But he showed no interest in me but since I was his client, he couldn’t either. It was probably forbidden to have a relationship with a patient.  
“So how about other relationships? You know, dating?”  
“That’s kind of personal”  
He looks at me confused.  
“Isn’t that why you are here?”  
He almost got me there.  
“Yes but that isn’t the problem. It’s the liking back thing. I like men that are taken or who doesn’t like me back”  
“I see” He writes on his notepad and looks up again “Could you give me an example where the problem occurs?”  
It is kind of a strange question but he asked for it. I lean my left elbow against my knee I have bent over my other.  
“Well, there’s this man that I really like but I don’t know anything about him. I don’t know if he’s single or married. But he’s so sexy I can’t take it. I think about him all the time” I try to give him a hint with my eyes that I’m talking about him but he doesn’t take the bate

He just writes something on his notepad. Maybe it didn’t affect him one bit or he was turned on. I wouldn’t know since I couldn’t see under the desk. For real I knew how to turn on a man but now I had to pretend I was a total novice.  
“Is it someone you work for?”  
“No, it’s a total stranger”  
“So why don’t you ask about his marital status? What stops you?”  
“I don’t know. Maybe rejection” I lean back in my chair  
“If you don’t ask, you’ll never know the answer. Sometimes you have to take a risk even you get nothing in return”  
I would take the risk. I knew it would be a no but at least I tried. I lean back on my knee with my right elbow.  
“So are you?” I smile and he looks at me puzzled  
He puts the notepad and the pencil on the desk. He sits up straight.  
“Say what?”  
“Are you single or married?”  
“Are you practising on me? Shouldn’t you tell the guy you like?”  
“I am asking”  
“I’m sorry Miss Sidney but we’re not allowed to date our patients” He says and looks at the time on his wrist watch  
“So it’s Miss now” I smile  
“Besides, our time is up. I think you should see another psychiatrist because I can’t help you. I’m sorry about that” He stands up from his chair

Disappointed I take my purse from the floor. He gets to the door and opens it wide. I get there but before he can react, I give him a passionate kiss. He’s so tall I have to stand on my toes. I keep my right hand on his chest and then let go. I look in his eyes and smile before leaving. I don’t look back. I wasn’t his patient anymore so he was free to change his mind.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are not what they seem.

I get to work the next morning. More happy than usual. I didn’t know why. Clara asked me how it had gone and she was surprised by my answer.  
“That wasn’t what we planned. We were supposed to take revenge. Did you forget?” Clara wasn’t happy at all  
“But you should have seen him. He’s hot”  
“It doesn’t matter. What should we do now?”  
She had a reason to be upset. We really did plan revenge. Things weren’t the way they seemed. I really didn’t need a psychiatrist. The truth was I only went there to see what my big sister, Joanne had to deal with. Dr. Tom Hiddleston was her psychiatrist for a year but then instead of helping her, he made things worse. He wasn’t as nice as he seemed. She suffered from anxiety and depression. He made her feel better for a while. They became lovers. Not dating patients were all a lie. He broke the rule over and over again. He made my sister happy until he started to stalk her. She broke it off but he didn’t leave her alone. She got him a restraining order but that didn’t help. She felt so helpless that one day she went to the forest. She was found dead by hanging in a tree. It broke our happiness. Our parents got so distraught that their marriage failed. I really was 17 at the time. That day I decided to take revenge. I told Clara about my plan and she would help me. But when I did meet Tom, I changed my mind for a while. Without Clara, I wouldn’t have gone through with it. He would get what he deserved.  
“OK, I’m sorry. Now I can understand what my sister went through. There’s something about him that is so irresistible. We will do what we planned”  
“That’s good. For Joanne” Clara and I shook both of our left hands together  
It was a manner we did since we were kids. We would put our plan in motion at lunchtime.

At 12 am, I take the rest of the day off like we had planned. I borrow Clara’s car. It was a small black car that no one would pay attention to. I would follow every step Tom would take. He would taste his own medicine. I couldn’t follow to the building his office was but what he did outside of it was easy. I parked the car in front of it and waited. I wore a cap and a pair of dark glasses so he wouldn’t recognize me. 

At 2 pm I see him come out of the building. He walks to a dark blue Jaguar that is parked a few meters away. He probably got paid very well if he could afford a car like that. He must be in a hurry since he is driving so fast. I can hardly keep up with him. He drives to the suburbs and slows down. The streets are empty. It was quite a quiet neighbourhood. He drives to a driveway in front of a big white house. I park the car a bit further away. I follow what he does. He gets out of the car and leaves it unlocked. A blond woman steps out of the house and they kiss. Was that bastard married too? He really lived like a king for sure. A beautiful wife and a nice life. It was so unfair. I was boiling inside. He probably didn’t even remember what he’d done. I’m about to step outside when he gets back. The woman follows him and they talk a while. I’m too far away so I don’t hear what they are saying. They kiss goodbye and he gets inside his car. He drives away from the driveway while his wife waves to him. She gets back to the house. I start the engine and follow him. Thinking he’s going back to work, he drives the other way. Where was he going? He drives through the suburbs and then stops by a brick house. He didn’t park the car in the driveway but instead left it on the street. I stop my car behind a tree but so I see what he’s doing. He walks to the house and rings the doorbell. He looks around like he was worried someone would see him. The door opens slowly and a blond young girl opens the door. She looks fragile and she doesn’t smile. Maybe he’s making a house call but then he kisses her lips. She didn’t look pleased. I was appalled. Was she his next victim? She seems reluctant to let him in. He says something to her and she lets him in. I didn’t even want to imagine what he was doing in there. It took forever before he came out and this time he was alone. He gets back to his car. I wish I could go and talk to the girl but I had to follow him. He drives to the highway and back to the city. It was already 4 pm when he gets back to his office. It was time for the next move. This time I would go as myself. I wouldn’t say anything about what I know. I would try to seduce him but it wouldn’t be easy.


	4. Chapter 4

I had a cream white dress in my car and dark brown high heels. I change the glasses to my contacts. I put some make-up on. I call Clara and tell her what I saw. I promised to be careful. One look in the mirror above the steering wheel and I step out of the car. There was a lot of traffic outside but the offices were closing for the day so there weren’t many people left. I could go right inside the building and up to the 10th floor. Tom’s secretary had already left. The door to his room was closed so I knock on it.  
“Come in” He says inside and I do so  
He looks up from his laptop. He didn’t look happy.  
“Hi Dr Hiddleston” I say with a smile  
“The office is closed” He continues on his laptop  
I sit down on the chair in front of his desk and look at him. I didn’t want to be friendly. He could have fooled me if I hadn’t known what he was about. He thought he could just move on and continue lying to his wife and others. I had to keep a cool head. I lean my elbows against the desk and look closer at him. He notices I do but he pretends to ignore me.  
“Could I call you Tom?”

He didn’t reply. What he had on the screen was more important. I try to take a peak but it’s too far away. He’s typing something on the keyboard. I move my fingertips across the top of the laptop. He glimpses at my fingers quickly and then back on the screen. The light from it lightens up his eyes even more. One thing was sure; he could make any woman fall for him by just looking in his eyes. I was here on a mission and nothing else. I suddenly push down the screen of the laptop and he looks upset at me.  
“Hey, I was working on that. What do you want anyway?”  
“You’re not my psychiatrist anymore so we can date each other”  
“If you thought a kiss will change everything then you’re wrong” He pushes the laptop lid up again  
“So you do remember it. I just wanted to remind you what you’re missing”  
“Sorry to bring it to you but it wasn’t that special. Could you leave, please?” He looks up and then at the screen  
He tried to hurt my feelings but I knew it was more to it. I had to get him confess he’s married. I move my right hand to his left hand and run across it. He looks upset at me and takes his hand away.  
“You’re just saying that so you don’t have to confess what you really feel about me”  
“So you can read my mind now, can you? I’ve got work to do so please leave me alone” He looks up quickly

Taking slowly didn’t work. I want to make him really upset. Maybe he was the type that wanted a tough approach. I stand up from the chair and walk to the other side of the desk. I see what’s on screen and it really is a report he’s writing. I bend down and put my hands on his shoulders and before he can take them away, I’m already massaging them.  
“No wonder you’re so intense. This job must be really stressful. Listening to people’s problems all day” I move my fingers back and forth while I looking at his neck  
“OK, you can stop now” He tries to wiggle my hands away but I just continue  
I get closer to his ear.  
“Oh Tom, you smell so good and your lips taste divine. I need a man like you” I whisper  
“OK, it’s enough” He takes a grip off my wrist and turns his chair so he faces me  
I just smile and he stands up still holding me. He looks down at me. He’s about to say something but then just shakes his head. He loses the grip off me. He’s not as angry as he was. He sits back down on his chair and turns back to the computer. That was weird. He calmed down as fast as he got angry. Have I succeeded in my plan after all? I stand there thinking what to do next when he clicks save and switches off the laptop. He takes his mobile from the drawer and looks in it. He’s calling someone that I assume is his wife.  
“Sorry, but something came up and I’m gonna be late. See you later. Bye” He ends the call and put the mobile on the desk

I’m still standing behind him puzzled. He turns his chair towards me and this time he takes my hand. He drags me closer to him while spreading his legs wider. He pulls me closer and he looks up at me. He moves his hands to my hips and is about to lift the hem of my dress.  
“What do you think you’re doing?” I try to take his hands away  
“You said it yourself; you need a man like me. This is how I am. I might just come out and say it, I sleep with my patients. The hotter, the better. They are usually blond because they turn me on. But I make an exception with you. You’re really resilient. I really admire that about you”  
This wasn’t really going like I planned it. I didn’t want to sleep with him or anything like that. The thought of Joanna came to mind. I was doing this for her. I push him away.  
“Was that your wife you called?”  
“Wife? I’m not married”  
“Oh, then who was it?”  
“That’s no concern of yours. Now show me what you got under that dress. I’m dying to know” He tries to lift the hem again but I step away  
“I should go” I get to the door  
“Wait, what makes you think it was my wife”

My heart was beating faster. I was just about to open the door.  
“You-you said you’re not married” I turn around  
“Well. Um, I lied. Sorry about that” He smiles like it was no big deal  
What game was he playing? This whole situation was tasteless. I just wanted to go home. My revenge had failed. I was relieved though that he didn’t suspect me. He stands up and gets to the door. He looks down at me and then bends down to kiss me. He runs his left hand across my chin. I keep my eyes open but so was his. The blueness of them was penetrating. I could see the same passion I felt inside me at this moment. I could do anything he wanted. I was a bit curious how it would feel like to feel him inside me. I hadn’t had sex in a year. All kinds of thoughts entered my mind until I woke up from my thoughts.  
“No, I can't do this” I push him away and our lips part  
He wasn’t upset.  
“Is it because I have a ring on my finger? Believe me that it means nothing to me. I didn’t voluntarily get married. It was her idea. I did something I shouldn’t”  
Was he going to confess to me about Joanna? That would be solved quickly.  
“What happened? Did you kill someone?” I try to joke but he looks at me seriously “Oh sorry. Was it?”  
“Let’s not talk about that. It’s spoiling the moment” He tries to kiss me again but I walk past him and get to his desk  
“Sex, sex, sex, is that the only thing you think about?” I turn around to look at him  
“Well, yeah”  
“You should need a psychiatrist the most”  
“Analyze me then” He smiles “I already know what you’re gonna ask”  
“Want to bet? Sit on the couch over there” I point at it and he gets there  
“How about making it more interesting? Every right question I guess, you take something off. Like strip psychology”  
I pretend to think it over and then look seriously at him.  
“No” I say determent “Lay down on couch”

I take the chair behind the desk and roll it over to the couch.  
“If you really want to feel like a psychiatrist, take the notepad from the desk. I’m sure you want to write down notes”  
I get there and find an empty one. I take a pencil and get back to the chair. I cross my right leg over the other and cover my knee with the dress. I never thought I would ask a psychiatrist questions. The whole situation was turning direction. I didn’t know what time it was but it was already dark outside. He looks up to the ceiling with both of his hands on his abs.  
“How was your childhood? Happy? Tragic?” I look at him with the notepad on my lap  
“It was quite alright. Expect that my parents got divorced? But otherwise, it was good”  
“Did that have some affect why you are the way you are now?”  
“Maybe but a lot of other things could have affected the way I am” He looks at me “Are you writing down anything?”  
“Yeah” I write a few keywords “Why did you become a psychiatrist?”  
“To help people through their problems I guess. I’ve always been interested in human behaviour”  
“So when did you start to sleep with your patients”  
He looks at me while I write on the notepad.  
“That question is irrelevant. Next”  
“That was the last one. Analyzing you next” I read what I wrote

He sits up and waits patiently.  
“Um, what was that last question about?”  
I stop reading and look at him without replying.  
“Let’s see. Your parent got divorced so you’re afraid of commitment. Your fear of real intimacy has affected your career. You use psychology to get what you want. No one listens to you so you force them instead. So the reason you sleep with your patients is power over other people’s weaknesses. The same with this situation. You want power over me and when I won’t give it, you get violent instead”  
“That’s quite good. I don’t agree with all of them. Especially the last one. I never get violent and I’ve never forced anyone”  
“OK, I’m wrong then”  
“Maybe that’s the reason you only like men from a distance. As soon as someone wants to get intimate with you, you back off. How many men have you had with that attitude?”

It made me want to come clean but the plan to get revenge was still clear. It just would take a little more time.  
“Just because you’re a psychiatrist, it doesn’t mean you know everything”  
“OK, prove it. Let’s do it on this couch right now. Come show me what you got” He tries to take my hand but I stand up  
“Proving it by having sex with you? Think again” I throw the notepad and the pencil in his lap  
I get to the door and storm out.  
“I’ll think about you when I screw my wife tonight” He shouts after me  
I had been there for too long. It was already 10 pm when I got home. Clara must have wondered why I hadn’t called when I have promised I would. I only wanted to cry.


	5. Chapter 5

In the morning I call Clara and tell her what had happened. She got a little upset when I told her I almost slept with Tom. She suggested I should tell his wife about the whole thing but I thought it was too soon. The store worked for itself so we didn’t have to be there. We would have the day off and follow him. She would pick me up at 8 am. At the breakfast table while I’m eating I begin to think about the poor girl at the house. Who was she and was she in danger? She didn’t look well and after the talk, I had with Tom, anything could have happened. I would ask Clara what she thought. I’ve only mentioned it to her on the phone. I get myself ready. I lived in a flat in the city so I didn’t have a long way to go to work. The psychiatrist offices were on the side of the city so we needed to drive there. Clara picks me up exactly the time as we agreed. This time she had borrowed her brother’s blue Audi. She was the one with two brothers. One of them was a police officer so in case we needed help in anything we could go to him. We couldn’t tell anyone we were stalking someone. It was for a good cause, to help to catch the real person who caused my sister’s suicide. Tom might not have wrapped the rope around her neck but he was the reason she did. Every time I thought about it, the angrier I got.

Clara drives us to the building where the offices were. The psychiatrist practice would open at 9 am. We park the car on the other side of the street. There was quite a lot of traffic but we could still follow what’s on the other side. It was already 9.30 am when we see Tom coming with his Jaguar and parks the car in front of the building.  
“Wasn’t it 9 am that his practice opens?” Clara asks and looks at me  
I just nod and we keep watching. He steps out of the car and locks it with an automatic car key. This time he’s wearing a black suit without a tie. He didn’t seem to be in a hurry. A blond woman walks past him on the street and he looks up and down at her from behind. He walks a few steps backwards and smiles, still looking at her. Then he gets inside the building.

“So what do you think?” I ask after a moment  
“I see what you mean but after what you told me about yesterday, I feel the same. He is a jerk and he should be stopped. I wish we could follow him instead” She looks at me and pauses “I get an idea. Why don’t I become his patient? I am blond and I could make up a problem easily”  
“No Clara. Too risky. It’s better we just wait”  
“Alright” She looks outside again  
It would be a while, so I put the radio on. We keep looking out of the window. It was a busy street so there was always someone there. Suddenly, my mobile rings.  
“I hope everything is fine in the store” I take my mobile from my jacket pocket and look at the screen “It’s an unknown number”  
“Answer it” Clara looks my way  
“Hello, Jennah speaking”  
“Hi, this is Dr Hiddleston’s secretary. Could you come to the office later on? There’s a bill for you. I could have sent it by letter or email put only you gave the phone number”  
“Um, sure. What time?”  
“You can come right away if you can” She says on the other end  
“Alright, see you soon” I switch the mobile and put it back in my pocket  
“So” Clara moves in her seat to look at me  
“I should get to the psychiatrist office to pick up my bill”  
“I could do it. Maybe I get to meet the doctor himself”  
“I don’t know if they give it to you” I look at her  
“I say I’m your friend. Didn’t you use the name Sidney as the last name?”  
“Yeah but still”  
“Come on Jennah. I doubt you want to meet him. I can ask questions you can’t. Please”  
I think a while and then say yes. She smiles and opens the car door to leave. I was worried about her but I was sure she could handle it in case she met him. I watch her walking across the street after looking left and right for a free street. She had her brown skirt and flats on her feet. Her white blouse was covered with a black leather jacket. She’s a bit taller than me and her hair was loose. I was a little envious of her natural curls. She enters the building. She’s on her own now.

Clara is going up with the elevator to the 10th floor and finds the door to enter. She sees a female secretary at a desk and gets there.  
“Hi, I came to get the bill for my friend. She couldn’t make it”  
“Your friend’s name is?” The secretary asks  
“Miss Sidney, Jennah”  
While she searches for it on the laptop and prints it out, Clara looks at the closed door while waiting.  
“Here” The secretary hands it out and smile  
“Thank you” She quickly takes a glimpse at the cost and is surprised  
He must be a really expensive psychiatrist or Jennah was being screwed. She’s about to leave when the door to the doctor’s office opens.  
“Have my next patient arrived yet?” The doctor asks the secretary  
“No, Sir. I tried to call but” She gets interrupted  
“Well hello there?” He says to Clara “Take a break” He keeps looking at her with a smile without looking at his puzzled looking secretary  
“Hello” Clara says and smiles back  
“But I have work to do, sir” The secretary says to him but he doesn’t pay attention  
“Where did you come from? Do you work in the building?” He says to Clara who got a little closer  
The secretary understands she has to leave so she does so. She closes the door behind.  
“No, I just came to pick the bill for my friend” Is her reply  
“Come in. I have time until my next patient arrives which can take a while” He gets to the open door to his room  
“OK” She follows him and he closes the door behind them

She sits on the chair across his desk and he gets behind it. He sits closer to it and lays his arms on the table with his fingers crossed. She keeps looking at him. She understood even more why Jennah had almost fallen for him. He is so incredibly handsome and that voice of his was hypnotizing. But she hadn’t forgotten why she was there in the first place. He keeps smiling at her without saying a word. Was he trying the silent flirting? The one where someone stares at a person until the other crack.  
“Maybe this is too bold to say this but you are a very beautiful woman. I bet you’ve had a lot of partners” He suddenly says  
“Yes, that is bold. I just met you so I don’t have to answer that”  
She wouldn’t let his charm discourage her so she plays along.  
“Don’t be so modest” He smiles “Does it make you uncomfortable when someone compliments you?”  
“No, I’m only uncomfortable with this bill. 400 pounds for an hour? You got to be kidding” She looks at the bill and then at him  
“If you get good service, you need to pay for it. Is your friend poor that they can’t pay?”  
“Some service. Did you buy them dinner?” She jokes  
“Well I did offer but, you know” He smiles again  
“I think this is some kind of punishment. Didn’t the patient want to get better or what?”  
“Why are we talking about this? That’s confidential” He looks seriously at her  
“Sorry I was just wondering” She folds the bill and put it in her jacket pocket  
“So you don’t need psychiatrist help then?”  
“Not if I had to pay 400 for it. I rather talk to a friend about my problems”  
“If you let me buy dinner, then I do it for free” He smiles again  
“No thank you. I have to get back to work” She stands up and he does too  
She’s about to walk to the door when he gets there first.  
“Not before you let me kiss you” He tries to touch her but she doesn’t let him  
“Isn’t your patient waiting?”  
“Like I said, it can take a while. But a kiss is just for a moment. I know you want to”  
He only thought she did but she had to get out somehow.  
“Alright” She says and gets closer to him

She stands on her toes and he bends down. She lays her hand on his chest and their lips meet. He tries to kiss her deeper but she pushes him gently away. It had taken longer than expected so Jennah probably was already worrying. Clara opens the door and leaves the room. He closes the door and leans against the door with his eyes closed. He wanted so much more. The secretary was already back but Clara just leaves without looking at her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the comments and kudos so far. I really appreciate it.
> 
> The story continues.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jennah and Clara continue following Tom.

I look at the time. Clara had been gone for 20 minutes so I assumed she had met Tom. There’s was nothing on the radio so I close it. I look out of the window and finally see Clara entering the car.  
“Phew that was close” She says as soon as she’s inside  
“Well, how did it go? I was so worried something had happened”  
“He did exactly what you went through” She looks at me  
“He kissed you?”  
“I had to or I would never have come out. You know, he could be a great partner but it’s that weakness of his. He would never be faithful. You would think he’s a sex addict. Imagine that, a psychiatrist who can’t even handle his own problems”  
“And my bill?”  
She takes it from her jacket pocket and gives it to me.  
“By the way, he’s ripping you off”  
I open the bill and I’m shocked at the cost.  
“I knew he would get back to me because I didn’t sleep with him. He’s so gonna get it so it hurts” I’m so upset  
Clara looks out of the window.  
“Look, he’s leaving. I guess his patient didn’t come” She starts the engine  
He’s getting to his car and drives in high speed like the last time. Now we had a better car so we can keep up better. He didn’t drive home this time. I knew where he was going.  
“He’s going to that poor girl again” I mention  
“A patient I guess. Let’s see what this maniac is up to”

He drives to the suburbs and to the same brick house. We park the car from a distance but so we can see what’s happening. The same girl opens and it’s the same again. She still looked fragile and even more scared than before. She lets him in after he said something to her.  
“Let’s go and peak in the window” Clara is about to open the door on her side when I grab her arm  
“We can’t make things worse. He can’t find out who we really are” I’m really worried now  
“We can’t let him do this. Maybe he’s raping her and we let it happen” She looks at me  
“What can we do if he really is? Call your brother?”  
“Or the police. But first, we got to know what’s going on”  
“OK but let’s not make a sound” I open the door and she does the same  
It was a quiet street. Maybe that’s the reason he had chosen this place. We close the car doors as silent as we can. We look around to see no one can see us. The brick house was in the middle of trees. We sneak closer to the house. There were closed curtains in every window so we couldn’t see inside. There were no sounds coming from inside. We’re almost crawling on all fours on the ground. Luckily there was no vegetation near the house so we didn’t have to worry about falling over and hurt ourselves. Suddenly, we hear sounds from one of the rooms. Clara tries to peek inside but curtains were closed there as well. Tom was saying something but we didn’t hear what it was. The house had quite thick windows. Then he raises his voice.  
“You do as I say. If you want to get better, you suck it” He commands the girl

We look at each other and giggle like school girls. Without a sound of course. What kind of mental technic was this? We knew exactly what was going on. The girl was in danger but not as bad as we thought. I didn’t want to hear anymore so I show with my hand to Clara that we should leave and we do so. We run to our car and we can finally laugh out loud.  
“Oh my, that was unbelievable. Really poor girl” Clara says between laughs  
“I say. He is crazy” I laugh but not as much as her  
We calm down and wait what will happen next. It’s about an hour when he comes out of the house. We wait before Clara starts the engine and follow him. He drives back to the office. It was already 2 pm.  
“I wonder if he’s secretary knows what he’s up to. She did leave when I stayed there” Clara says when we wait for the next move  
“And she did leave when I got there. It wasn’t even 5 pm yet” I interrupt her and let her continue  
“Maybe her job is over earlier”  
“Probably. But it’s still weird. I wonder how many men he has as clients. He did say he likes blonds. The hotter, the better. That should actually be his slogan” I giggle  
“That’s a good one” Clara laughs a little  
“We shouldn’t laugh about this” I’m serious again  
“You’re right. But it is strange therapy. He should get them better and not worse. Just look what he did to Joanna”  
“After I heard what happened in the house, his wife should know”  
“Maybe she already does. Didn’t he say he didn’t want to get married?”  
“That’s right. So?”  
“Well, she knows what he did so she must know he’s cheating on her”  
“We won’t know before we ask. I know where they live. I don’t think she works”  
“What if he gets home and you’re there?”  
“That’s the point. Scare him. I’m even gonna say my real last name. He won’t do anything if she’s there”  
“That sounds dangerous and isn’t that the climax of the plan. You haven’t changed it, have you?” She wonders  
“He won’t become cautious if we only follow him. We can’t sink to his level. He did everything he could to make my sister suffer. He preys on the weak and he’s not one of them. The plan is still the same but a bit different”  
“OK. We do as you say. But be careful so you don’t say too much”  
“I will. Will we get there now?”  
Clara looks out of the window to see his car was still there and it was.  
“Sure. I drive you there. I don’t think anything will happen here” She starts the engine  
I tell her where to drive and the rest of the plan I had thought in my head. If this plan didn’t work, nothing would.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jennah meets the wife.

Before we got to Tom’s house, we stopped at a gas station for some gas and something to eat. It was getting closer to 4.30 pm when we get to the house. Some of the neighbours were coming home so there were a lot of people around. We decided she would drop me off and I would call her when I was ready. I walk up the driveway. The house is white and has two floors. I hadn’t looked at it that closely before. There was a flowerbed on the grass lawn. I get to the front door and take a deep breath. I ring the doorbell and wait. I look at the flowers. After a moment a blond woman opens the door and smiles. She looks a little different than before. Her hair was in a ponytail like mine and she wore blue jeans and a plain T-shirt.  
“Nice flowers. Planted them yourself?” I ask before introducing myself  
“Thank you. Yes, it is. I used to be a gardener”  
“Oh I’m Jennah Sibley”  
“Hi, I’m Chrystal Hiddleston. Come in”  
I step in and see a big white hall with a big mirror on the left of the entering. Right in front, there is a living room with paintings on the wall. The kitchen was on the right and the stairs on the left. What was strange was that she didn’t ask what my business is. I was a total stranger and she let me in. Maybe I had a friendly face.  
“Oh, I’m sorry I didn’t ask what your business is. Silly me” She says amused  
“It’s OK. I do that too” I smile because it was true “I’m a friend your husband. Or actually a mutual friend”  
She has crossed her arms on her stomach after I turned around to face her. She didn’t look as happy as before.  
“Oh, I see. I don’t know any of his friends or past ones”  
“Well, I don’t really know him. I just met him once. He was more a friend of my sister. Well, more than that”  
She looks even more confused but then smiles and puts her arms down.  
“Would you like something to drink? Tea? Coffee?”  
“Coffee would be fine, thank you”

We get to the kitchen and she gets to the counter where the coffee maker is. I sit down on the round table with flowers on it. The kitchen had white cabinets and a wooden counter on both sides of the kitchen. The fridge was situated in the corner of the window. From there you could see the backyard. The dishwasher was on the right. The kitchen itself was really clean. Chrystal puts two cups with saucers and two spoons on the table.  
“Do you use cream or milk?” She asks while putting the sugar bowl on the table  
“Milk, please. You got a very clean kitchen. Much better than mine” I smile to lighten up the mood  
“Oh thank you. I like cleanness” She smiles shyly and then gets to the counter where the coffee is ready  
She seems absent-minded. She almost forgets the milk. She’s about to sit down after putting the coffee pot on the table when she remembers. I pour her some coffee and then to mine.  
“I’m sorry. I haven’t had any guests lately” She says when she sits with the milk and pours herself some  
“It happens. Forgetting things” I pour some milk and sugar in my cup  
“Sorry again. Did you want something with the coffee? I have biscuits if you like”  
“It’s OK. Just coffee is fine” I smile a little and take a sip from my cup “It is good coffee”  
“Thank you” She smiles back and then takes a sip from hers  
“Have you lived here long?” I put my cup down on the saucer  
“About 4 years” She keeps her right hand on the ear of the cup  
She keeps her left under the table like she’s hiding something. I look outside the window for a moment and then at her. She didn’t look at me.  
“It must be quite expensive to live in a house like this?” I try to keep the conversation up  
“Yes but Tom’s job pays well” She looks at me for a moment and then take a sip from her cup  
400 pounds per hour does get you a nice house, I think to myself. I was still miffed about that. There’s a clock on the wall above the door. It was already 5.30 pm. Maybe that was the reason she seemed nervous. She didn’t start a conversation and she gave short answers. She’s too nice to tell me to leave.  
“So long have you two been married?”  
“About 6 years I think. I’ve lost count” She smiles  
That was almost straight after my sister took her own life. That said a lot.  
“That’s quite a long time. My longest relationship was a month” I didn’t know why I told her that but this wasn’t going anywhere  
“Want some more coffee?” She suddenly asks and stands up, getting to the counter  
“No thank you” I say and smile  
“Chrystal, you didn’t meet me at the door”

Tom is home. He enters the kitchen and when sees me sit by the table, he gets a puzzled look. Chrystal turns and smiles at him.  
“We have company. This is Jennah Sibley” She’s a little nervous, I could hear in her voice  
I smile at him. He looks even more confused. He recognized me but my last name was different. He was smart so he could figure it himself.  
“Chrystal, I think I forgot my jacket in the car. Could you get it for me, dear” He looks at her and takes his car keys from his trouser pocket  
“Sure” She gets to him and takes the keys  
He looks back at me and then looks behind him to see if Chrystal has left.  
“I thought your name was Sidney” He stands where he is  
“No, it’s Sibley. Remember that name?”  
“Should I?”  
“Joanna Sibley, my big sister. Ring any bells?”  
He isn’t upset. He thought he could fool me.  
“No sorry. I want to know what you’re doing here. Waited for me perhaps?” He grins  
“Yeah right. Like I want to have anything to do with my sister’s killer” I get upset  
“I’m sorry but what are you talking about?” He gets on the other side of the table but he doesn’t sit down  
Chrystal gets back to the kitchen but she doesn’t suspect anything.  
“Are you sure it’s in your car?”  
“Look again” He looks at her by the door and she gets back

“Don’t pretend you don’t know” I say when she’s gone  
“I don’t know what you’re talking about?”  
He was so annoying.  
“Then I tell your wife what you’re doing”  
“Are you threatening me?” He’s getting upset  
“No, you are. I’m only reminding you”  
“Get out of my house” He points at the door but I won’t move  
“Scared your wife will find out your secret? My sister took her own life because you couldn’t stay away from her. Some psychiatrist you are. You’re supposed to help them and not make things worse” I’m angry  
“I had nothing to do with it. Leave before I call the police. You’ve entered a private resident”  
“So how about that helpless girl you’re forcing to have sex with you?”  
“Are you making things up as you go alone? You’re wasting your time”  
“You’re denying that too, I see. Well, maybe you confess to the police then” I’m about to stand up but sit down again when he sits down on the chair across the table  
“OK, OK. I had nothing to do with Joanna’s death. I loved her but I went too far. I wanted her to love me the way I loved her. I know I shouldn’t have done what I did but I can’t take it back now”

I look at him for a while. I didn’t know if I should believe it or not. He lied before. Chrystal gets back to the kitchen and sees something was up.  
“I didn’t find your jacket. Maybe you forgot it at work” She puts the keys in front of him  
“I think I did” He looks up at her “Sorry to you bother you”  
I look at Chrystal whose doubt has disappeared. I was still unsure what was going with her. Now she seemed to be alright again.  
“It’s getting quite late. So Jennah I could take you home” He says to me  
“I can call my friend to pick me up”  
“You don’t need to bother. I don’t know if I never see you again so I would really like to talk to you some more”  
“I think we already said everything. It’s better I call my friend” I stand up and take my mobile from my pocket  
“I insist. Please”  
I didn’t trust his intentions. I could meet the same faith as my sister. Chrystal looks at me. She tries to make me take the offer. I’m quite good at reading people’s faces. I look at Tom but he was a different challenge.  
“Alright” I agree even if I was unsure  
He takes his car keys and stands up to leave the kitchen.  
“It was nice to meet you” Chrystal says to me by the front door and gets closer to my ear “Be careful” She whispers  
That was the warning I was afraid of. I had just agreed to be in someone else’s mercy. Worried, I follow Tom to the outside. Chrystal stands by the front door. Before opening the door on the passenger’s side of the car, I take a look at her and swallow hard. It was time to leave.


	8. Chapter 8

I’m silent the whole trip to the city. Tom is driving like the car was on fire. I was a little scared. He asked where to drive me but when we get closer to the city, it wasn’t even close. I’m worried there for a while.  
“I have to get my jacket from the office. Do you mind if we stop there first?” He glimpses at me  
Was he really asking? So far he hadn’t shown any signs of doing harm to me so I agreed. He slows down and parks the car on the other side of the street. He asks if I wanted to come with him. I was too afraid to say no so I followed. It’s 8 pm and the building was closed but he had a keycard so we could go in. He was strangely nice. Deep inside I knew it was just an act but my heart was telling otherwise. We get to the elevator and to his floor. It was quite creepy there after office hours. I walk behind him and look forward. He unlocks the door to the office and turns the light on. I wait in the waiting room while he is in his office. He finds his jacket on the couch and takes it. He stays there a while. The door is a little open. I see he sits down by his desk and takes something from the drawer. It’s just his other mobile. He stands up and gets to the door. He switches the lights off and closes it. He smiles at me and then stops.  
“Do you mind if we stay here a while?”

I didn’t know what to say. Was he making his move? No one was here so he was free to do anything he liked. He throws the jacket on the couch. He sits down on the end of his secretary’s desk with both of his hands on each side of him. He keeps smiling at me but I look away.  
“So what this different name thing? Did you just want to see a psychiatrist in secret?”  
“Something like that” I quickly look at him  
“Is this about your sister? Did she really kill herself because of me?”  
“Yes” I only say and look away again  
“I’m sorry she did. That must have been really difficult for you and your family. I really am sorry. She was unstable and had a really difficult time. But I can’t take responsibility for what my patients do. It’s their decision and I can’t help it”  
I’m boiling inside and I want to scream at him but I keep it inside. I look at him upset.  
“You followed her even if she said to leave her alone. She couldn’t go or do anything. Nothing helped. You drove her to kill herself. It’s all your fault and you should get jailed for that”  
He stands up and gets closer to me.  
“And yet here you are. You can’t be that mad at me. If you were you wouldn’t be here with me” He tries to touch my hair but I step back “Come to think of it, you do look a bit like her”  
“Please take me home like you promised”  
“I thought about you when I made love to my wife last night. It made the sex even better” He looks up and down at me without touching

It wasn’t that unpleasant but still, I wanted to refuse him. His eyes were darker in the dim light. He was the same person but still different. Yesterday I felt some kind of connection with him but it all changed when I saw what he did with the girl. He’s in the sensitive state so I ask him about the girl.  
I lay my left hand behind the back of his neck and the other on his abs. I look closely at him while I talk.  
“Tell me about the girl”  
“What girl?” He tries to kiss me but I move my head backwards  
“Don’t touch. You’re in my command” I look upset at him and he smiles “Tell me about her”  
“Well, she’s a patient that I treated for about a year. Treated is not the word. It’s a lesson” He looks into my eyes  
“Lesson of what?” I caress his neck  
“Sex” He tries to kiss me again but I refuse him  
“Is that her problem or is it yours?”  
“Is this your way of foreplay? If it is I like it”  
“Shh, I ask the questions” I take my left hand away   
“OK. It’s both I guess. I want it but she doesn’t. My turn now” He tries to touch me but I take a grip of his wrist  
“Is it safe or do you harm her?”  
“You mean rape. I don’t do that. She’s willing” He pauses “Wait a minute, how did you know about all of this?”  
“I followed you” I say without realizing it might upset him  
“Oh yeah. Curious, are you?” He smiles but stops when he sees my upset look  
“You followed my sister so I decided to do it to you too”  
“But you failed because. Um, you feel something for me?”  
“No. I didn’t want to sink as low as you” I move away from him  
“OK, you got a point there. Like I said, I’m sorry about your sister. I guess I’ve acted like an ass after that”  
“So you admit that. Joanna’s death really did affect you”  
“Actually, I didn’t know until a year later” He sits down on the couch

He really was sincere. He didn’t want to hurt me. I didn’t think he would open up to me like this. What I didn’t really understand were Chrystal’s reactions. Was she afraid of him or did she have a problem of her own? I sit down on the couch beside him.  
“Was it true that it was Chrystal’s idea to get married?”  
“No, it was mine. I didn’t want to be alone and then I met her. She was a perfect choice at the time. But then I met you” He looks at me “I didn’t show it because I didn’t want fall in love again”  
I look at him in doubt. Now he must be lying.  
“Oh please. You can’t fool me”  
“It’s true. I’m actually ready to change. We had such a great connection the second time we met. I didn’t want anyone else after that. I understand you don’t believe me”  
“Hell no. Not after the way you tried to sleep with me. Then all of this psychiatrist nonsense. Analyzing me”  
“But you lied about that. I knew the second you described your problem. I just played along”  
“OK then we are both liars” I smile for a while but then stop “But it cost me 400 pounds”  
“Oh that. I apologize. I was upset. You don’t have to pay. I wasn’t really helpful” He looks at the time “I should take you home. It’s already 11 pm”  
I hadn’t realized we were still at the office. It had been a strange day and evening. I wasn’t afraid anymore. This turned out quite productive. Clara would be upset since I didn’t call her. She would be furious I had decided to skip rest of the plan. We had decided to see each other even if he was still married. It was too early to say how things would turn out next.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Contains sex.

Even if Clara were my best friend, I wouldn’t tell her what exactly had happened. I get to work as usual. As soon as I entered the door, I meet her.  
“What happened to you last night?” She says calmly “You didn’t call. How did it go with the wife?”  
“I’m sorry about that” I walk to the backroom where she follows  
“Well?”  
I sit down on the chair and she sits on the other one. I tell her what had happened. I leave the office part to last because I didn’t want to shock her. The store would open in 20 minutes. The other employees would come in later.  
“So you just gonna quit the whole stalking thing?” She says after I told the whole situation “Just because he said that?”  
“I know it sounds crazy. Especially what happened at the office when you were there”  
“I say” She interrupts me  
She didn’t like the idea we were going to see each other. But she just had to accept that.  
“But he’s not the person we thought he was”  
“Yeah right” She rolls her eyes  
“Listen, Clara. I know you don’t trust him but he showed a totally different side of himself when I told him about Joanna”  
“Well, he’s lying. I don’t think he feels remorse at all. He’s using you the same he did with your sister. And the wife. She sounds unstable too”  
I had made up my mind and nothing would change it. One of the employees had arrived. It was time to open the store.

We always closed at 5 pm. I told Tom where the store was. He would pick me up. It was only me and Clara left when he gets there. She ignores him completely. He didn’t know we were friends so he was kind of surprised to see her there. I‘m in the backroom but I could hear what was said.  
“So you’re Jennah’s friend”  
She’s folding a blouse and she doesn’t look at him. He didn’t approach her. I get back to the store and he smiles at me. I smile back and get to him. He gives me a kiss. Clara gets to the backroom.  
“Are you ready?” He asks after the kiss and caresses my hair  
“In a moment. I’ll right back” I get to the backroom to get my things  
Clara is sitting on the chair. She doesn’t look happy.  
“Please don’t go with him. Think about his wife” She whispers  
“Stop worrying. I can handle this” I look at her while I look in my purse for my house keys  
“I don’t doubt that but he will cheat on you too” She stands up  
“You don’t know that. He said he will change his behaviour for me”  
“I can’t believe you think that. How about your revenge? Will that ever be fulfilled?” She still whispers  
“We talk about this later. Call me” I say and leave before she can say anything

I smile when I get to Tom. He opens the door for me and we get outside. His car is in front of the store. There was a lot of traffic. He didn’t say where we were going.  
“You didn’t tell me you two were friends” He says when we wait by the traffic lights  
“Regret it now?” I look at him  
“What?”  
“That you forced her to kiss you”  
“No, I don’t. I never regret anything. Her were lips were sweet. A shame she didn’t want more”  
The lights turn to green and he speeds up. He drives to the highway. He was in a hurry again which made me wonder why. It seemed he had no problem talking to me about my friend the way he did. I’ve read about psychology in college so I knew something about it.  
“Do you always talk about your conquests to other women?” I ask after a while  
He looks puzzled at me.  
“Conquest?” He laughs “Is that what you call it?”  
“It’s not funny” I look upset at him  
“Oh, I’m sorry. I thought you didn’t mind if I talk about your beautiful friend” He glimpse at me once in a while  
“I didn’t say I want details” I look outside the window “Where are we going anyway?”  
“You’ll see soon” He replies without looking my way

It did feel a bit awkward the way he talked about Clara. The drive had taken quite a long time. We were far away from London. I didn’t know if this was a first date or something worse. The scenery had changed and fewer cars were on the road. I had never been here before. He slows down and turns to a smaller road. There were trees and no street lights. Luckily it wasn’t that dark yet. I was getting worried. I have quite a wild imagination and all kinds of thoughts came to my mind. I thought about the young girl who he’s been “teaching” like he’d describe it. My mental mind was fine and I wasn’t easily fooled. He should have known it by now. I look at my mobile in my purse. I did it so he wouldn’t notice. There was no signal which made me frightened. The road narrows and a small hill are in front. He drives up to it and a middle-sized detached house with a balcony is on the hill. It was in the middle of nowhere.  
“What’s this?” I say when we stop in front of it  
“It’s my second home. Here we can be alone”  
“Doing what?” I say quickly  
He looks at me and smiles.  
“Anything you want. I let you control me. I like that” He puts his hand on my left knee  
Was that supposed to turn me on? I did like his honestly though.  
“Alright” I smile and touch his hand but I take it away “You asked for it”

We take our seatbelts off and step out of the car. I take my purse with me. He locks the car doors and we get to the house. It was in the middle of the forest. We get inside. It’s getting dark outside so he switches on the lights. The house had two floors. We enter into a big living room. The whole first floor was a room. It looked clean even if it’s probably been unused lately. The curtains were closed. In the room, there was a brown couch set with a wooden table in front of it. In front of that, there’s a fireplace. Above it, there’s a painting with a beautiful landscape.  
“Make yourself at home. I hope you don’t mind if I get upstairs to take a shower?”  
“No, not at all” I smile  
“I won’t be long” He then walks up the stairs to the other floor  
I get to the couch and sit on it. I look around. The kitchen is in another room beside the front door. I look at my mobile and there still was no signal. I wasn’t as worried as I was before. So far nothing weird was going on. I think about what his wife would think if she knew he was with me. She had warned me after all. In a moment he gets back downstairs. 

He’s changed his clothes from his black trousers to grey jogging pants with a dark blue T-shirt. He’s barefoot. His hair is wet and messy. I put my purse on the table.  
“Is that what you call comfortable?” He grins while getting closer to me  
I just keep looking at him. I was a bit infatuated. There was something different about him but I couldn’t put my finger on it.  
“How comfortable should I be? I can’t be naked, can I?” As soon I heard what I said, I regret it  
“Well” He looks up and down at me “Now that you mention it. It would make my job easier”  
“Still on that? You said I should take charge and this is it” I stand up and get to him  
I stand on my toes and get closer to his lips but I don’t kiss him. My right hand on his chest, I look closely at him and him at me. He lays his hands on my hips. I can feel him move them to the zipper behind my skirt. I push him away and look upset.  
“Keep your hands to yourself, mister”  
“I will if you kiss me” He tries to but I step back  
“So you want punishment instead?”  
“Isn’t this it? I sure already am suffering”  
I look down on his groin and see a big bulge in his pants. I keep looking at it. His breathing is getting heavier. I slowly lay my hand there and he grunts. I look up at him and without a warning, I kiss him passionately. I begin to moan and make him walk backwards until he hit the wall beside the fireplace. He doesn’t touch me. I press my body against him and I feel his hardness against me. Slowly I’m grinding against him while we kiss. I was about to enter a territory I never thought would happen. He made me feel wanted. All my hindrances disappeared and I became someone else.  
“Oh Tom” I moan and wraps my arms around his neck “I want you”

He lays his hands on the hem of my skirt and lifts it up to my waste while we keep kissing. He pulls down my panties so they fall down my ankles to the floor and he touches me below. Our lips part and we look at each other.  
“I’ve never felt this much wetness in my life. You must have held on for quite a while. Is this all because of me?” He looks into my eyes  
“Yeah. That’s your price for respecting me” I touch his lower lip with my right-hand index finger  
He thrust his two fingers into me and then takes them out again. He brings them to his mouth and tastes me”  
“Mm, I wouldn’t need food after this. I could eat you”  
“You don’t deserve that” I say and take a grip of the bulge which makes him grunt again  
“Don’t think you deserve it either. Keep your hand off my cock” He takes my hand away  
“Using rude words doesn’t make me go any faster. I’m in charge, remember?”  
He doesn’t say anything. I step back and take both of his hands in mine. I walk backwards looking into his eyes while biting my lower lip. I turn around and push him to the couch. He smiles at me but I would make sure this wasn’t pleasant. I sit on his lap facing him and move my hand to his hair. I pull it and move his head to his right side. I get to his neck and bite him gently. It makes him groan. I kiss him there and move behind his ear. His breathing is getting heavier.  
“You like that, baby” I whisper in his ear and I keep going  
I move back and forth while I kiss him. He keeps his arms on the couch. I didn’t even need to tell him he wasn’t allowed to touch without my permission. I could feel his soaked pants mixed with my fluids. I stop kissing him and look down at his groin. I run my fingers inside the waistband of his pants while I bite my lower lip. I start to moan and my breathing gets deeper.  
“You really want it, do you? You wanted it the first time we met”  
“Yes” I manage to say and then pull it out  
It’s fully erected and rock hard. My concern was how something this big would fit inside me. I take a firm grip of it and is about to put it in my mouth.  
“You bad girl” He says upset and slaps my hand so I lose the grip  
“Oh, Tom you are enormous so I just want to suck it. I never want to take it out” I’m so aroused  
“Not this time” He takes it in his hand and direct it closer my opening “Ride me”

I had never been this ready. I finally got to feel him. Slowly I get on it and we both sigh of relief. It slides in smoothly. It felt so good. While I move back and forth on him, we look at each other. He keeps his hands on my hips while my arms lean against his shoulders. I start to move faster and soon I’m riding him. We moan together. It was so erotic. He stimulates my little nub with his right hand. He calls out my name and I do his. I understood why he wanted to come to this house. There were no neighbours for miles. He didn’t know me but somehow he anticipated how loud I was. He was the reason. No one has ever made me feel this way. He felt so good. He keeps complimenting my bouncing skills. When I finally reached my climax, I scream as loud as I could. Lastly, we kiss. I withdraw and we undress. He takes me on the couch one more time. It was the best sex I ever had and I knew then this wouldn’t be the last.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after.

I wake up in a strange bed. I slowly open my eyes and remember where I am. It was a big bed and the sun was peeking through the curtains. I look on my left side and see it’s empty. I didn’t know what the time was. I look under the sheets and see I’m naked. I didn’t see my clothes anywhere. I wrap the sheet around me and get to the closet beside the bed. There is a woman’s bathrobe so I put it on. It was warm and cosy. It was the right size too. I get to the bathroom and look at myself in the mirror. My hair was a mess. I didn’t like the way I looked in the morning. I didn’t use that much make up but now I really needed it. I keep looking in the mirror. I startle when Tom gets there and puts his arms around me from behind.  
“Hi” I say and smile  
“Shouldn’t it be good morning? In your case, beautiful” He kisses my right ear  
“How did we end up here?” I turn around  
“Don’t you remember? We did it downstairs. Upstairs. Even on the stairs. I didn’t even know you wanted me that much” He smiles cheekily  
“Speak for yourself” I walk past him and get to the bedroom where he follows me  
“It was worth it. I never had so much fun. We should do it again sometime. By the way, your clothes are downstairs. I also made you breakfast. But you better hurry because I have to get to work” He then leaves the room

Some other time? What did he mean by that? I get downstairs. I pick up my clothes and get back up. I would take a quick shower. I didn’t think I would spend the night. Clara must have been worried sick. There was no signal so I couldn’t call. There was no phone anywhere. My purse was downstairs so I get back there. I had a comb and make-up in it. When I’m decent I get to the kitchen where Tom is drinking some juice. He smiles when I get there.  
“Sorry, there’s no coffee. I hope you don’t mind”  
I sit down at the long wooden table.  
“It’s OK. I can drink at work. What’s the time?”  
“6 am. Hurry or I’ll be late”  
I pour some juice in a class on the table. There is a sandwich on a plate. I didn’t eat that much in the morning anyway so I didn’t need much. He looks at the time and stands up to put the things away.  
“Ready?” He looks at me  
I eat the sandwich quickly and drink the rest of the juice. He gets to the hall and opens the front door. I get my purse and look if I had everything which I did. I get outside and he locks the door. It had been raining so everything was damp. We get inside the car and drive away. I take my mobile and look for a signal but there’s none yet. It really was a middle of nowhere. We didn’t say anything. He puts the radio on and the news is on. The signal gets back and I see Clara had called many times. Tom is listening to the news so I didn’t disturb him. I read one of Clara’s text messages. She sounded like she was in a panic. I decide to reply and say everything is alright. In a moment I get one back. The mobile was on silent. She had almost called the police but then she went to see his wife. Chrystal hadn’t been worried because she knew the truth about him. I wasn’t going to tell him that I knew now. I look at him. I think about the night we had and it made me smile. He glimpses at me.

“What?”  
“Oh nothing” I touch his ear and then to his neck but he didn’t seem to mind “How is your little, or should I say big friend doing?” I look at his groin  
He’s wearing blue jeans and white long-sleeved shirt.  
“Not bad but thanks to you, it won’t be the same again” He smiles  
“Um, what did you mean by some other time?” I stop touching him “It sounded like we won’t see each other”  
“You didn’t really think this was a relationship, did you? It isn’t and it won’t either. Not when I’m still married” He glimpse at me  
I had a lump in my throat. Did he just use me like Clara had warned?  
“So this didn’t mean anything?” I would be brave and not start sobbing  
“Of course it did. What I meant was that I can’t be more to you than an occasional affair. I’m sorry if you thought something else”  
“You know, you can be so cruel sometimes. Don’t you have any feelings at all” I say upset and a tear appears on my cheek

We were getting closer to the city so he slows down. It was getting more traffic so we had to drive in a queue. He looks at the time on the radio. He was getting agitated with the traffic so he honks at other cars. He didn’t say anything about what I said. I wait for him to cool down.  
“We should have left earlier. Thanks to your slowness, we get stuck in this damn traffic. For your sake, I hope I’m not gonna be late” He looks quickly upset at me  
It wasn’t my fault. Why did we have to go so far? I dry my tear. He wasn’t worth crying over. The traffic lets up and he calms down. He looks at me.  
“I’m sorry about that. I didn’t mean to be upset at you”  
“Road rage much?” I say without a smile  
“I guess that my other bad side”  
It was too late for him to apologize. He hurt my feelings and that would be the last time.  
“You know Tom, you really are an ass. And I let you do things to me” I’m so angry so I look out the window  
“Well, what did you expect? I sleep with my patients for crying out loud”  
“You still gonna do that?” I look at him  
“Maybe”  
I shake my head. I should have known he just tried to be nice. I regretted it now that I slept with him. He leaves me in front of the store. He promises to call but I wouldn’t believe that. It’s 8.30 am but Clara was already there. I would tell her everything that had happened.


	11. Chapter 11

A week later I sit home after work. It’s been hell ever since that day when I was with Tom. He did call but only to have sex so I declined. I wasn’t someone he could use for his own pleasure. I actually started really liking him. I thought he would change but he didn’t. Clara was there for me at least. I had made clear to Tom that if he wanted to see me, it should be for me and not sex. Even if Chrystal knew about our affair, she still stayed with him. I wanted to become friends with her but Clara convinced it wouldn’t work. It was for the better when things turned the way they did.

I get a call from Tom that he needed my help. He convinced me it wasn’t about sex so I agreed. Chrystal did indeed have a mental disorder and it had got out of hand. She was a clean freak and suspected everything. She could hide her anger very well but lately, she had screamed at everything Tom did. I don’t know why I would help him. He gave her a reason to act the way she did. He did cheat on her frequently. I must have been too caring for him and he didn’t even deserve my attention. We meet in his car at a park. He tries to kiss me but I push him away.  
“So why do you need my help? I don’t want to get involved with your problems”  
“I decided to leave her and she went berserk”  
I’m god smacked. Did I hear right?  
“So you found someone new already” I’m disappointed  
“No, it’s for you. I love you” He puts his right hand on my left knee  
I didn’t believe him. It was probably one of his lies. I take his hand away.  
“You must be kidding”  
“That I love you?”  
“That and that you leave your wife”  
“Well, it’s true. I’ve really been thinking about this. I thought this would make you happy”  
“Some psychiatrist you are. No wonder you couldn’t help my sister. Never think about how someone feels because you can’t know” I look at him a bit upset  
“Alright, then I won’t leave her. But it doesn’t change the fact that I love you”  
“You only say that to get me into bed. You got your patients to do that with. And that girl. How much sex do you really need?”  
“I’ve actually stopped that and the same with the girl. It’s all because of my love for you. Please, Jennah I really mean what I say”  
There had to be something fishy about this. I didn’t want to believe anything he said.  
“You’re really trying to hurt me on purpose by telling all these lies. You said you didn’t want a relationship”  
“I can change my mind, can’t I?”

I hiss at him and look out the window. I can feel him touching my hair but I keep looking out. He kisses my neck.  
“I thought one wasn’t enough. Until I met you” He says between kisses “The way you made me feel when we spent the night together”  
I push him away and look angry at him.  
“So it is the sex you want and not me. I knew it all along. I can’t believe I slept with you. Besides, it wasn’t even that good” I look back outside  
“Ouch, that hurt me so much” He’s sarcastic “It didn’t look like that. You wouldn’t have let me take you in different ways if it was bad”  
I wanted to hurt his feelings but it seemed he was thick-skinned. It had been unbelievable but I didn’t want to admit that to him. His ego was boosted too much already.  
“So why did you call me? To discuss how much you love me?” I look at him  
“Problem solved”  
“What?” I’m surprised  
“Since I won’t leave my wife, there’s nothing to discuss. I take you back to work” He’s about to turn the key in the ignition  
“Wait a minute. First, you call me to say you need my help. Then you say you love me and are leaving your wife for me. Now you’re not”  
“So you are interested” He smiles  
“I didn’t say that. I think you’re a liar and a cheater. Why should I believe anything you say? Be honest. For real this time”  
“First of all, thanks for calling me a liar. When it comes to that cheating part. You would too if you lived with a person who questions everything you do. I listen to people’s problems all day. Then I come home and have to listen to the same thing all over again. I need some stress release and sex is. It just happens to be patients. I know it’s wrong but they’re more than willing”  
“Oh, Tom I love you so much after that. Not” I roll my eyes and he looks at me confused “Boohoo, your wife doesn’t give what you want so you try to find it with someone else. Why did you even marry her if she’s that much trouble?”  
“I don’t where you’re going with this. I did love her but things change. I want you and I don’t only mean sexually”  
“What a difference a week makes. You didn’t want a relationship and now you suddenly do. What is the real goal here?”

He sighs. I could see it wasn’t a conversation he wanted to be part of. I’m just trying to figure out what the truth was.  
“I see you still don’t trust me. I guess I can’t prove it other than show it” He takes his mobile from his jacket pocket and calls someone “Hi, it’s me. Cancel all of my appointment for today. I won’t come back. Have a nice weekend” He ends the call  
I had no idea what he was up to. I tried to ask but he didn’t reply. He starts the engine and drives to the street. He drives at high speed again. Just because he had a fast car, it didn’t mean he could break the law. I realize where we’re heading when I see familiar surroundings. We were going to his house.


	12. Chapter 12

Tom drives to the driveway and stops the engine. The door to his house opens and Chrystal stands by the door. She didn’t look happy. I understood why I was here. He wanted to break up with her in front of me. It was quite cruel to do so. He steps out of the car and gets to her. But when she sees me, she gets furious.  
“What a hell is she doing here?” She shouts angry at him  
“I’m serious about her and I want you to know I truly do want a divorce”  
“So you brought your whore here” She still keeps shouting  
I look around to see if any of the neighbours were nearby but I guess they weren’t home.  
“Let’s go inside” He says and walks past Chrystal  
She looks at me despitefully. I feel a little uncomfortable. She gets inside and is about to close the door behind but I get there first. Tom is in the living room.  
“Any more of your whores coming here?” She shouts  
I stay in the hall. I felt like I was in a middle of a war zone. The usually clean house was messy. There was a broken chair in the hall. A broken flower pot on the kitchen floor. The living room had clothes and magazines spread out.  
”Don’t call them that. And what have you done here? One of your tantrums again” He says calmly while looking around the room  
“Why would you care? I can do what I want?” She’s still furious  
“This is my house” He looks at her but still stays calm  
“I don’t care. You’re not gonna screw your new whore here”  
“I wouldn’t give you that pleasure”

What was he trying to prove? That I would fall in love? This wasn’t fun and it’s unpleasant to be in a middle of their fight. I still stand in the hall. I didn’t want to move.  
“No, you do it at your other precious house. I know what use that for. With me, you just want normal sex but with them who let them do anything. Did you think about her when you were with me?” She doesn't calm down  
“Yes, and it made it so much better. I still think about it right now” He closes his eyes for a moment  
“Did you send her here to make a fool of me?” She points at me  
“No, I didn’t even know her at the time” He glimpses at me over her shoulder for a while  
She surprised of the answer and then turns around to look at me. She calms down and gets to me. Was she gonna do something?”  
“Who are you then if you’re not a patient?”  
“Leave her alone” He says and gets to where we are  
“He used to be my sister Joanna’s psychiatrist. She killed herself because of him” I started to remember that and woke me up from my dream  
I look past her and look at Tom.

“Now I know why you’re so eager to tell me you love me. It’s not about me, it’s about my sister. You’re trying to make it up to me. You feel responsible for Joanna’s death. I should have seen this. I can’t believe you as a psychiatrist can’t see it” I’m a little upset  
He looks puzzled. He looks at Chrystal who smiles a little. He looks back at me.  
“No, that is not it. I didn’t even think about that”  
“Of course you didn’t. Has sex blinded your judgement? I don’t even think you’re capable of love. I’ve seen how you look at beautiful women walking down the street. You even tried to seduce my friend Clara because she’s what you like. Beautiful and blond. Admit it, it makes you hard” I say and look down at his groin  
Lucky for him it didn’t show through his black jeans but I knew he was. He looks at his wife whose she’s also looking down. He swallows hard.  
“That’s not true” He tries to say without trying to prove he was  
“Wow, she is good. She should be a psychiatrist and not you” Chrystal says to him after looking up again

She’s calm unlike him. He tries so hard not confess. He is probably thinking about it right now.  
“It’s really eating you out, isn’t it? Feeling that tightness but you can’t release it. Hm, what should you do? Keep it inside or take it out? Wait, you can’t because we’re both here and you don’t go that way. Or do you?” I tease him  
“OK, stop. I got your point. I admit sex does control me but it hasn’t softened my brain. And yes I am hard but it’s because of you Jennah” He looks at me “Sorry Chrystal but I don’t feel the same about you”  
“What?” She gets upset “You choose her over me because she can talk dirty?”  
“It’s more than that” He smiles at me  
“God, just go with her then. I don’t care!” She’s so angry she runs upstairs  
“Was that really necessary?” I’m a bit upset  
“Yes, it was. If I want her to get the point. Besides, the faster she leaves the better so we can make love. It’s still true about how hard I am” He gets to me and tries to kiss me  
I put my hands on his chest and push him away.  
“How can you think about that now? I really don’t like the way you treated her”  
“She can find another psychiatrist if she wants. I’m done with her and her problems” He tries to kiss me again  
“Were you her psychiatrist?” I’m surprised  
“Yeah” He tries to kiss me again but I push him away  
“For 6 years?”  
“Yeah, what’s your point?”  
“So you married her because?”  
He steps back. Had I hit a nerve?  
“It’s a long story but I kind of felt sorry for her and I didn’t want to be alone. I told you before about that”  
“But you’re not. You always had someone, right?”  
“Having sex with someone is not the same as being with someone. You can still feel lonely even if you have someone. Do you know what I mean?”  
This was the side of him that I wanted to see and not the one who wanted to be tough.  
“Yes I know”

Chrystal is walking down the stairs with a big suitcase. She looks at us upset.  
“I thought you two were already at it. Can’t make it work?” She sarcastically says  
“No, we were waiting for you to leave. I don’t want to make you jealous” He evilly says  
I look at him and mime to him ‘don’t’ She shows him her tongue and gets to the door. I whisper to him to go and apologize.  
“Wait, Chrystal” He gets to the door “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude”  
“Safe it. Have a nice life. You two deserve each other” She’s angry and opens the front door “Jennah, good luck with this jerk” She says to me and leaves, slamming the door behind her

“Why must you always act like a jackass? It’s so unbecoming” I get to the kitchen to get something to drink  
I take a glass from the cabinet and look in the fridge. There’s a bottle of water so I pour some and then drink it in one go. I lift the broken flower pot on the kitchen sink. Tom gets there and he looks upset.  
“I can’t believe what she did. The bedroom is a mess and so is the bathroom. A clean freak and this much crap. Should I call her back?” He looks at me  
“Don’t be silly. She’s not your cleaner. I can understand why you chose her though”  
“That’s not the reason. She’s too clean. Not a single crumb anywhere. Heaven’s forbid if you left a stain on the counter. World war 3” He gets to me and wraps his arms around me  
“We should clean this up” I try to get away from him but he holds me tighter  
“What about making this a real date? Dinner and sex. It doesn’t need to be in that order. We can clean up later. Or maybe go to your place”  
“I guess you want sex first” I lay my hand on his groin  
“You read my mind” He opens my jeans and pulls them down  
He opens his and pulls them down. He lifts me up on the counter and takes me. But dinner was out of the question. It was dark outside so we get into his car and it’s my turn to pleasure him. It was too messy in the house so we couldn’t be there. We spend the night at my place instead.


	13. Chapter 13

A month later I move in with Tom. It took longer to work but we went to work at the same time. When I told Clara about what had happened, she got really upset at me. She didn’t talk to me for a week. We could work together but we didn’t talk. She gave up because she couldn’t stay mad at me for too long. She was happy for me but also worried. She couldn’t stand Tom for what he was. I tried to tell her he wasn’t the same but she didn’t want to believe it. I tried to get them to get on but she didn’t want to. Technically he was also still married so that disturbed her even more. She wanted to prove I was wrong so we made a plan. She invited him to the store after hours. Like she guessed he got there. I was in the backroom and heard everything. It didn’t go as she planned though.  
Clara is in the store folding a few blouses. The store had just closed. The front door opens and Tom steps inside.  
“Hello” He smiles and she looks up  
“Hi” She smiles back and gets to him  
“So what is this important thing you wanted to say?” He looks around and then at her  
“You don’t remember when I got to your office and we kissed. Passionately I would say”  
“Yeah, so?” He looks strangely at her  
“Is that dinner still valid?” She touches his chest while looking up at him  
“You know I’m with Jennah. I don’t think she would like it”  
“Let’s skip dinner and try that amazing tool she’s been bragging about” She moves her hand to his groin but he takes her hand away  
“I don’t know what this is but I don’t sleep with my girlfriend’s friends. Not even the beautiful ones”  
“You did cheat on your wife with your patients several times”  
“That was then. If this was all, I have to go” He’s about to get to the door when she grabs his arm gently  
“Please don’t go. I know I’ve acted like I don’t like you but that’s just an act. I do. I really do. So much that I touch myself when I think about you and it feels good” She licks her lips seductively

That wasn’t planned. She wasn’t supposed to go this far. I wanted to storm out and stop this show.  
“Really? Hm, that’s interesting” He gets closer “I didn’t think you would feel like that”  
“I find you so sexy and I wonder how you feel like”  
He gets closer and touches her hair. It was loose and her curls were hanging over her shoulders.  
“I actually really enjoyed our little kiss. I thought about it a few days. It did get me hard and now when I look at you, I know why” He gets closer to her lips when I storm out of the backroom

She was right. He did take the bait. But instead of being startled, he smiles at me. I’m confused. He moves away from her and gets to me.  
“You thought you could fool me with this little charade. I know you don’t really trust me so you two made a plan to get me” He then turns to Clara who feels relieved because she truly still didn’t like him “I must say, you really are a good actress. You should do it for a living. But it is kind of rude trying to get me with that talk. It could have worked before but not anymore”  
“This is not funny. I really thought you were serious. Never do that again or I’ll smack you” She shakes her head in disbelief  
“You can count on that”  
“You’re actually wrong” I say and he looks at me “I do trust you but she doesn’t. It’s was her idea”  
“Really?” He looks at Clara  
“Maybe you haven’t noticed but I don’t like you. I think you’re a cheat. You think you can get any woman you want with your charm and good looks. You’re an egomaniac and seek attention”  
“Is that so? So it’s not just denial?”  
“There you go again. Just get out of my sight” She says upset and gets to the backroom  
He just smiles.  
“Must you do that?” I say and he looks at me  
“Sorry but it’s kind of funny to tease people”  
“They might think its flirting. I get my stuff” I say and get to the backroom

Clara is packing her things in her purse. She’s upset.  
“God, he’s annoying. How can you stand it?”  
“Maybe he’s right. Maybe you like him for real. You’re not blind. He’s gorgeous, you said it yourself”  
“I don’t deny that. It’s his whole personality I can’t stand”  
“I know he can be a bit too much. But when he’s with me, he’s totally different. He tells me things he never told anyone before. He’s relieved he doesn’t need to listen to problems at home” I take my bag from under the table  
“Like I said, it’s just an act. You’ll see. He will get back to be an ass again. I know when someone is aroused and he was”  
“Sorry, you feel that way. I got to go. See you tomorrow” I say and leave  
He’s doing something on his mobile when I get to him.  
“OK, I’m ready”

He put the mobile in his jacket pocket and opens the door. His car is in front. Before starting the engine, he turns to me.  
“What was that all about?”  
“What?” I look at him  
“I’m not seeking attention am I?”  
“Well, maybe when it comes to women at least”  
“That’s obvious but not as much as before. Thanks to you” He touches my hair and then starts the engine  
We would go to dinner. On the way there I think about what Clara said in the backroom. I know he had finally changed but still in the back of my mind, I doubted. I looked at his groin just in case but there was no sign of anything. Clara had indeed said things to him that could turn him on. When we get to the restaurant I forgot what had happened.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after.

The next morning I wake up in Tom’s arms. After dinner, we went straight home and made love until dawn. He confessed he had felt something when Clara had tried to seduce him. But it wasn’t for her but the words. He told me to talk the way she did and it triggered something amazing. He really got off easily by just talking dirty. It was so easy talking about sexual fantasies to him. Even the craziest ones. Before this all, I wasn’t that open about sex. I weren’t actually a prude but close to it. He taught about things I didn’t know about. He was 12 years older after all. I watch him sleep. It was 7 am but there was no hurry. We both called ourselves sick so we could spend all day together. I was in love and all I wanted was to be with him. I kiss his lips and he slowly opens his eyes. I gasped every time I saw his eyes shine so blue. It never stopped to amaze me.

“Hi” I say and smile  
“Hi” He smiles back and caresses my hair  
I kiss him again and get on top of him. I can feel his hardness against me.  
“I think I’ve woke up the beast” I say when I stop kissing  
“You shouldn’t because. Now I have to take you” He turns me around and I spread my legs  
He gets inside me while we kiss and he starts moving back and forth.  
“Nothing beats a fuck in the morning” I say moaning between kisses and I wrap my legs around him with my arms around his neck  
He stops kissing me and pushes hard inside me so I scream.  
“That’s for saying a dirty word”¨  
I say it again and another push. I say it a few more times and then he reaches his peak. Exhausted he lays on his back beside me.  
“Oh Tom” I take his hand and lay it on my groin “It’s my turn. Touch me”

He thrust his fingers inside me and stimulating my throbbing nub with his thumb. He looks at my heaving chest and then kisses my nipples. I put my fingers in his hair. Every touch and move he makes I pull it. I’m about to come and he stops kissing. He loved watching my body move while I climax. At the end, I try to take his hand away but he takes me to the edge. My moans are loud. He gets to my lips and we kiss a while. He withdraws his fingers and gets them to my lips so I can taste myself. We look at each other and smile.  
“I love it when you come. Your breasts. Your cunt. Oh Jennah” He looks closely at me  
“Na-a, no bad words”  
“What else? I won’t call it by the real name” He smiles  
“I love you, Tom”  
“I love you too, Jennah” He gives me a kiss “I’m gonna take a shower. Want to join me?”  
“I’m gonna close my eyes for a while”  
“OK, I’ll be right back” He gets out of bed

I watch him walk to the bathroom and smile. I couldn’t believe how lucky I was to have someone like him. I get myself covered with the sheet and close my eyes to sleep. But I can’t do it for long when I hear a peep from his mobile on the night table. I’m curious to know who sent him a text. I get to the other side of the bed to pick it up. I read the message and I’m appalled.  
 _“I’m sorry baby I acted the way I did. I’m so sorry. I still love you. Please call me. Love Chrystal”_  
I couldn’t believe it. Was she gonna destroy our relationship with this nonsense? I hear him turning off the shower. I put the mobile back on the table and pretend to sleep. He gets out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist. He sits on the bed beside me and tries to take off the sheet. I open my eyes and pull it back up to my chin. I didn’t want to keep the message a secret. I tell him about it and he gets upset.  
“You read my text without permission. No one touches my phone” He stands up  
“I’m sorry”  
He gets to the other side of the bed and takes his mobile. I didn’t understand why he got upset at me. Maybe he was trying to keep something from me. He reads the text message and deletes it.  
“Bitch” He says and puts the mobile back on the night table “I’m sorry, Jennah. I didn’t mean to react that way”

I sit up on the bed but I was still hurt. He takes the towel off and throws it on the chair beside the night table. He gets back to the bed beside me.  
“Are you ready for another round?” He tries to kiss me  
“Why is your wife texting you?”  
“She always does that when she gets crazy. So how about it?” He tries to kiss me again but I move an inch away from him  
“But she’s not with you and never will, right?”  
“Please don’t spoil this moment”  
“Does it make you feel powerful getting attention from all these women?”  
“What are you talking about? You know I only want you. No one else matters” He caresses my hair “I already deleted the message. What else do you want me to do?”  
“I’m gonna take a shower so you can think about what you really want?” I get out of bed with the sheet around me and get to the bathroom

I hear him sigh deeply before closing the door behind me. I didn’t know what I was doing. I wondered about the reaction when I told him I read a private text. I still didn’t trust him. Maybe there was something on the mobile he didn’t want me to see. I put the shower on and stand under the pouring water. It was so warm so I could stand there forever. I didn’t know what Tom was doing but at this moment, I really didn’t care. This day had turned something totally different than I had expected.


	15. Chapter 15

I couldn’t stand in the shower all day so I switch it off. I didn’t hear anything from the bedroom. I take my towel that is hanging on the wall of the bathroom and dry myself. My hair is wet so I dry it with the same towel. I wrap it around me and get to the bedroom. I didn’t see him anywhere. His mobile is gone too. I had to put something on so I get my bathrobe from the closet. I hear talking from the living room so I get there but stop by the stairs. Tom is talking on the phone with someone. It is a heated conversation.  
“I’m sorry but you can’t keep in touch anymore. I’m with someone else and it won’t change. I told you time and time again, I want your name on that divorce paper and that is final. Goodbye Chrystal” He’s really upset but the call didn’t end there “Well, I don’t care what you think about her and I don’t care you still love me. Leave me alone and don’t you dare to get in touch again” He furiously ends the call and throws the mobile on the couch

I walk downstairs and walk to him. He had put his black jeans and a plain t-shirt on. He smiles when he sees me. I didn’t dare to say I heard the conversation.  
“Hey, there love. Are you still upset with me?”  
“I wasn’t upset” I stand in front of him but not too close  
“OK then. I just had a call from Chrystal and I told her the truth and it’s time for you to know it too. Let’s sit on the couch. It will take a while” He takes my hand and we get there  
“What truth is this?” I’m puzzled  
“I wasn’t really honest with you and you’re probably gonna hate me after I told you this”  
“OK” I look at him doubting  
“Your sister wasn’t the only one who killed herself because of me. Also the sister of Chrystal. The real reason why I married her was that I felt guilty. I had an affair with her big sister who was a patient of mine. The difference between her and Joanna was that I really loved your sister. I confess I was a very bad psychiatrist to both of them. You were right, I felt powerful when I got their attention” He tells me until I interrupt him  
“Wait a minute. You’re only with me because of pity? Clara is right, you’re gonna cheat on me too” I say upset and is about to stand up when he takes my hand  
“No, this time it’s different. Please don’t go”  
I’m still upset when I sit back down.  
“It’s the sex, isn’t it? You love that and not me” I look at him  
“That’s not true. Maybe it was earlier but not now. I prove it to you” He takes his mobile on the couch and looks in it

He searches the phonebook and shows me the screen. There’s a list of female names and there were a lot.  
“Wow, Mr Popular” I smile a little “Should I be impressed?”  
“See, all these phone numbers mean nothing to me. I let you delete all of them. One by one”  
“And that is proof that you love me for real? Maybe you just want to brag how many women you’ve slept with. Should this turn me on somehow?”  
“Still doubting, I see. I’m not bragging. I’ve only met these people once and that tells a lot. None of them has ever made me feel like you do. You’re the only one who didn’t give up on me. You have no idea what you make me feel when I’m not with you” He begins to touch my ear and down my cheek  
He puts the mobile beside him on the couch and moves his right hand between my legs. I didn’t stop him from doing so. He smelled so good so I was almost about to fall. But as soon as he would get further, I would push him away.  
“So this is how you seduce them then? Saying all these words to make them fall one by one”  
“Keep teasing me and you will see a totally different side of me” His breathing is getting heavier and he’s about to move his right hand to my opening  
I take a grip of his hand and look upset at him.  
“OK then. I’ll delete them but only if you back off”  
“Oh Jennah” He sighs and leans his back against the couch with his eyes closed  
I look at his groin while I take his mobile. One thing was for sure. I could not stay away from him no matter how hard I tried to resist him. While I’m deleting the numbers, I keep glimpsing at his growing groin. He still keeps his eyes closed. I had a lot of numbers to delete but I could just leave it and do things to him. I stop for a while but he had a sixth sense so he opens his eyes to look at me.  
“Keep on or you won’t get the prize”

I tried to concentrate but it gets more difficult. I don’t know how many numbers I had deleted when I couldn’t stand it anymore. I put the mobile on the table in front of the couch while staring at the bulge through his jeans. I take my bathrobe off and get on my knees on the couch. Without a warning, I take a grip of his groin and kiss him there. He has no time to react when I open his jeans and take his erected member in my mouth. He gasps and he doesn’t say anything. I take him deeper into my mouth and suck him. I had been waiting for this so long and I didn’t want to stop. My moans and his grunts were getting louder. We didn’t have this much noise in this house before. Now there were neighbours around so anyone could hear. He pulls my hair while I take him. He calls out my name and begs me to release him but I wanted to punish him. He had hurt my feelings and keeping secrets from me. I would make sure he would never look for sex anywhere else. I don’t know how long I’ve been taking him but when he finally releases his lust, he uses every dirty word that comes to mind. Exhausted, I sit beside him on the couch.  
“Wow. I can’t. Wow” He says between heavy breaths  
I calm down my breathing with my eyes closed. I look at him and touch the tip of his member with my index finger. I lick my lips.  
“Oh Tom you’re so tasty”  
He takes a grip of my wrist.  
“You had yours and now it’s my turn” He gets on top of me  
We make love on the couch. I still had numbers to delete but they were irrelevant now.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A familiar face enters Jennah's and Clara's shop.

After the weekend I get back to work. Clara was upset at me so she didn’t talk to me all day. She didn’t like I skipped work just to be with Tom. I tried to convince her he wasn’t the way she claimed but she didn’t listen. She was determent he would cheat on me. There wasn’t much I could do to change her mind. There were a few customers in the store when a familiar face appears.

“Hi, Chrystal” I smile when she enters the store  
Clara is serving a client so she didn’t know what was going on. Chrystal didn’t look happy. Her hair is cut short. She didn’t wear make-up like she used to. She’s wearing a pair of blue jeans with a plain t-shirt and a jacket. She still wore her wedding ring. I tried to be friendly but she could see right through me.  
“I want you to leave my husband alone. You had your fun. He’s mine” She is upset  
“No, you should. He doesn’t want you”  
“Oh yeah. You don’t know him like I do. Everything was fine until you came alone”  
“Fine? You must be joking. He cheated on you. That’s not fine” I’m calm  
“Shut up” She raises her voice “You don’t know anything, you bitch”  
Clara’s customer startles a little at the counter on the other side of the store.  
“Calm down Chrystal. You can’t shout in my store” I tell her but she doesn’t  
“Don’t tell me what to do. You listen to me. Leave him alone or I’ll make your life a living hell. I warned you” She points her index finger at me  
“Listen, bitch but you’re not gonna stand in my way. This is harassment. Leave before I call the police” I’m getting angry  
“What does he see in you anyway?” She looks at me in despise

I didn’t want to make this a fight so I don’t say anything. Clara’s customers have left so she gets where we are.  
“Problems?” She gets behind the counter where I stand  
“Who are you?” Chrystal says upset to her  
“Who are you? You’re driving our customers away” Clara is calm  
“Mind your own business. I’m talking to this whore”  
Clara is appalled and looks at me. Then back to her.  
“Listen, you’re in our store and we throw out troublemakers. You leave nicely or we have to take another approach” She’s still calm but it wouldn't stay that long  
“Are you on her side? Are you one of my husband's whores too?”  
Clara sighs.  
“She’s my friend and has nothing to do with this” I interrupt  
“I know what this is. You’re both in this fan club where stealing other people’s partners is fun. Maybe you change your mind when I show you this” She says and takes a knife from her back pocket and points it at us  
We step back a step and gasp. We hold each other's arms and keep staring at the knife. Chrystal has gone insane.  
“We must call my brother” Clara whispers to me

Luckily there were no customers but we could get interrupted any minute. Chrystal gets to the front door and turns the sign on the door to the closed side. She gets back to us with the knife, still pointing it at us.  
“Get to the backroom. We don’t want attention, do we?”  
We’re too scared to resist so we do so. We walk backwards while she follows.  
“What are you trying to gain with this?” I bravely ask but it upsets her  
“Shut up” She yells and I jump out of fright “Sit down both of you and let’s talk”  
We both keep staring at her and sit down on the two chairs.  
“I don’t want you to think I’m a bad person. It’s just this doubt in my mind that keeps playing in my head. It’s been like that since my sister killed herself. I had in control until you came along. In a way, it’s your fault, Jennah. You took something away from me that I thought I never lose. The one person that could help me. But now he doesn’t even care anymore because of you” She is calm again  
“Chrystal I” I try to say but she interrupts me  
“You only speak when I tell you to” She looks upset at me and then looks at Clara “Want to say something?”  
“No” Clara shakes her head nervously  
“Good. Now Jennah, you’re gonna call Tom to come here. I want to talk to him. Where is your mobile?” She says to me  
“In my purse in the closet over there” I point my head towards it  
“Get it”

I stand up and get my phone. She keeps pointing the knife at us.  
“Only tell him you got a surprise for him in the store. He likes that” She smiles little  
Nervously I find the number and wait for a reply. He probably was too busy so he couldn’t answer. I’m about to give up when he does.  
“Hi, babe. I’ve got a surprise for you in the store”  
“I’m busy. I have a patient waiting” He says on the other end  
“But this is really important. I want you to come. I’m alone and I need you” I say seductively  
It takes a while before he replies.  
“Um, OK. I’ll be there in 10 minutes. Be patient” He then ends the call  
“You are good” Chrystal smiles but then get serious again “Sit down and wait”  
Clara and I look at each other. Our friendship hadn’t been the same way it used to. Maybe this would bring us closer together. Neither of us knew what Chrystal could do so we didn’t say anything. She keeps standing where she is and looks around the room. I could understand she was hurt but not why she acted this way. Tom would not get back to her, I was sure. He loved me and nothing would change that.

About 10 minutes the front door of the store open. Chrystal points the knife at me and signs for me to meet him. When I get there we smile at each other. I’m relieved he was there and somehow he could sense something wasn’t right.  
“Hi baby” Chrystal appears from the backroom  
“What’s this?” He looks puzzled at her and then at me “You said you were alone”  
“Aren’t you giving your wife a kiss?” She smiles at him and get closer  
“I told you never get in touch with me again. I want you out of my life” He says upset  
“No, you’re just saying that in front of her. It’s me you love. Don’t deny it”  
“Don’t put words in my mouth. It’s been over for over a year. I don’t love you. I despise you. Now leave” He gets closer to her but then she takes out of the knife behind her back and points it at him  
“Don’t come any closer”  
My heart is beating faster. I had never been this scared before. He steps back.  
“Take it easy. You don’t want to hurt me. We can talk about this if you only stop this nonsense” He tries to calm her  
“This is not nonsense” She yells angry “You listen to me. If you keep seeing this bitch, I swear I do something”  
“You can’t control me. You need help but it’s not gonna be me. I love Jennah and as soon as I get a divorce, I’m gonna marry her”

My eyes wide when I hear it. Was it true or was it just something he said to provoke her.  
“No, you’ll never get it. You belong to me and I kill her if I have to” She’s furious  
“You do no such thing. Now give me the knife” He stretches out his right hand towards the knife but she swings it so it almost touches his wrist  
I gasp and steps back a few steps behind him.  
“Stay back”  
“OK but you have to stop swinging that thing. I understand you’re hurt but don’t take it out on Jennah. This is not her fault. If you want someone to blame, blame me. I’m the one who couldn’t help you”  
“Stop with your psychology junk” She interrupts him “I don’t need a psychiatrist; I need a person who listens to me. You never did. You only saw me as one of your patients and not the person I am. When I wanted your attention, you went somewhere else. You were never there for me”

While listening to her, I noticed they had a lot of unsolved issues. Maybe it was bad timing for me to get involved with someone at this stage. I’m about to walk past them to get to the backroom when she notices.  
“Where do you think you’re going?” She gets in front of me  
“Um, I thought I would”  
“Don’t think. Get back” She points the knife at me and I do  
She looks upset at me and then looks back at Tom.  
“Please let her go”  
“And Clara” I quickly say and he looks surprised at me  
“You have another one hostage? Have you gone mad?” He looks angry at Chrystal  
“That is not a hostage” She yells furiously “Stop twisting my mind. You keep doing that all the time. It’s because of you. I was totally fine before I met you. I can’t believe I fell in love with you in the first place. I could just slit your throat so I never had to see you ever again”  
She’s so angry she could actually do it but all she does is squeezing the handle of the knife as tightly as she can. I’m about to have it but I was still worried what would happen if I tried to attack her. I hadn’t heard anything from the backroom. I hope Clara is alright. Tom is strangely calm. He didn’t move an inch even if Chrystal was having her tantrum. The reason why came clear straight away.  
“So you’re threatening me again then. That’s the only thing you can do best. Then you wonder why I cheated on you with other women. You blame me for everything. Always doubting. You’ve never been completely fine. I wanted to help you but you didn’t let me. It doesn’t matter now since I’m not the same person anymore. You have to let it go”  
“Not this time” She interrupts and she gets closer to him

She stands on her toes and lays the knife against his throat. He swallows hard. It’s then I take my chance. I get to her and push her so hard so she loses her balance and the knife falls on the floor. I kick it further away and turn her on her stomach. I twist her arms so it bends behind her back. She screams in pain. Tom looks at me in shock. I had just saved his life. He gets down to me and while taking a grip of Chrystal’s other arm, he looks at me in disbelief.  
“Wow, where did you learn to do that?”  
“Hold her down. I’ll check out Clara” I say and get to the backroom  
When I get there, I see her unconscious on the floor. She’s been hit in the head. I roll her over and slap her cheek lightly. She slowly opens her eyes and tries to stand up. I help her to get on the chair. I calm her down and tell her it’s over. I get her a bottle of water from the little fridge on the right corner. I get back to the store where Tom has lifted up Chrystal on her feet. She had calmed down so he didn’t need to hold her. I see tears running down her cheeks. She looks down on the floor.  
“Is she alright?” I ask him with a normal volume  
He takes my hand and we get to the changing rooms. He pushes me against the wall and gives me a passionate kiss. He stops and looks in my eyes.  
“Thank you for saving me. You don’t know what a turn on that was” He gives me another kiss  
“This is not the time or the place. How can you think about sex at this moment? You’re wife just got a nervous breakdown and all you think about is that? Have you no shame?” I’m a bit upset  
“You said it, not me. I just wanted to thank you. You are naughty” He smiles  
“I’m sorry. My mistake. We should go back” And I do so  
Chrystal is still standing in the same place. I look for the knife on the floor where I kicked it but it wasn’t there. Had she taken it? I get to her and ask but she’s quiet. I look behind her back but it wasn’t anywhere on her. That was strange. I look behind me and see Clara with it. She looks at it closely.  
“Clara, what are you doing with that?” I’m so worried


	17. Chapter 17

Had Clara gone mad too? She stood with the knife in her hand like she was possessed. She keeps looking at it with evil eyes.  
“A shame she didn’t finish the business. You know I wish she would have come to our lives earlier. We could have got the revenge from both of your sisters. He’s been without punishment for too long. He wasn’t supposed to wrap you around his little finger but you had to fall for him. I don’t know who should go first, you or him”  
She looks at me but doesn’t come close. She never liked me to skip the plan we had. But I didn’t know I would fall in love.  
“Don’t do anything stupid. You don’t want to go to jail” I try to stay calm but my heart was beating faster  
“You don’t know what I want. You never did. I followed you wherever you went since we were in school. But you never asked me why. You saw me as a best friend but you were more than that to me. This is not about friendship that turns into love. I’m as straight as a person can be but I wanted to try something different for a change”  
“What are you saying? You’re straight but you want an affair with me? Now I’m confused”

She gets closer to me with the knife close to her left leg. She looks at me closely and touches my hair.  
“Yes exactly. You’re a beautiful woman with nice lips and nice breasts. I always wanted to feel them”  
“I’m sorry, Clara but I don’t go that way” I take her hand away even if she could use the knife on me  
“I’m sure your boyfriend wants to see two women kiss”  
“What have you done with him?” I look behind her  
“Nothing. He’s probably watching us. Let’s give him a show” She tries to kiss me but I move my head away  
She lifts the knife up to the waist of my skirt. Chrystal has noticed what was going on and she gets to us. She looks angry at Clara and takes the knife from her hand.  
“Yuck, two straight women kissing. How dare you? It’s disgusting. I rather go to psychiatric ward than seeing this. Tom can have you. I don’t want anything to do with him again” She puts the knife on the counter and gets to the front door to leave

“What is going on?” He gets from the backroom where the bathroom is  
“Yes, it worked” Clara jumps for joy and claps her hands together “The plan worked”  
She wraps her arms around my neck to hug me and then gets to Tom to do the same. I’m even more confused now.  
“I told you it would” He smiles  
“It was all an act?” I question  
“Yes, I just made it up in the backroom while you two kept talking to Chrystal. I wasn’t unconscious at all”  
“To pretend you were interested in me romantically?”  
“Exactly, she can’t stand if two of the same sex interaction. Tom told me what a prude she is”  
“Careful, it’s my soon to be ex-wife you’re talking about” He interrupts her excitement  
“I’m sorry. Anyway, she’s out of your life so you two can live happily ever after. Or whatever you couples do”  
“One thing. When did you two talk about this?” I doubt  
They look at each other. Had they met behind my back doing something they shouldn’t have? Had I’ve been betrayed by both of them? They seemed to get along much better than before.  
“OK, I have a confession to make. But don’t worry. It’s not the way you think?” Clara says and gets to me “We met last week in the city by accident. I didn’t want to talk but he insisted. We talked about you two and the thing with Chrystal. That’s where I heard about what she can’t stand. That’s all”

I look at Tom and he looks at me. For once I believe it was true. With the recent events, I understood what length he would go for us to be together. I get to him and give him a passionate kiss. He wraps his arms around my waist to respond. Clara is about to put the sign back to open.  
“Let’s close for the day. I think we all need a break from everything that happened” I say to her and then look back at Tom “Besides there are things we have to do” I give him a wink  
“You go. I can lock the doors”  
I get my purse from the backroom and we say goodbye to Clara.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a writer's block on this story so it will take some time before the next chapter.


	18. Chapter 18

A month later, Tom’s divorce is final. Chrystal wanted to get over with it as soon as possible. We really had upset her. We could begin our new life together. A week after that we went to Paris, France where he popped the question and of course I said yes. He wanted to marry me right there and then under the Eiffel Tower but I didn’t want to rush things. I wanted Clara to be at the wedding. I was so happy I had to call her to tell her the news and she was thrilled too. She had finally accepted my relationship with him. I wished she would find the same happiness as I had. I thought my excitement would calm down when we got back home but it didn’t. I never thought I would go this far with anyone. The first night we spent together was still fresh in my memory. I thought that feeling would be gone by now but it just got stronger. We couldn’t stay away from each other. He had cut down office times so we could spend more time together. On his breaks, he called me at work. We had this little game where he talked seductively and I should not try getting aroused. I failed of course so I almost got caught by a customer in the changing room. Clara didn’t notice anything. Once I got so aroused I had to lie I would go out to lunch. Instead, I went somewhere private where I could release my lust. If we continued like this, he would be the death of me.

The weekend was finally here. I didn’t have to be at work. I had time to plan my wedding. We would get married in early spring. On his birthday to be exact. Mine was in December so it wasn’t suitable. My parents got married on my father’s birthday. It was our own tradition, Tom said. I didn’t object to that. My wedding planning that weekend didn’t go as planned though but it didn’t matter since it was only August.  
“Let’s do something out of the ordinary” He said when we laid in bed after a passionate night  
“Like what?” I keep my chin and my left hand on his chest while looking at him   
“Ever made love in someone else’s kitchen while other people are in the flat?” He touches my hair  
“That is bold so no. But I guess you have”  
“No I haven’t but the thought gets me hot. Getting caught is even better” He closes his eyes for a while  
“How about your office? Done it there?”  
“Yes and I got caught”  
“By your secretary?”  
“Who else? So if you ever see her and she looks at you weird, then you know why”  
“I’ll remember that. Would you do it again?”  
“Is that a suggestion?” He smiles cheekily  
“No it’s a command” I get on top of him and he wraps his arms around my naked body “I want you to fuck me in your office”  
“No dirty words. Now I’m mad” He turns me on my back aggressively

He thrust inside me with force but I just laugh. He’d never taken me this hard before but I loved it. My fingers in his hair and him above me, we look into each other eyes. He’s still inside me after the climax. In a moment he begins to thrust slowly. I can feel him go deeper into me. We look at each other. I tried to figure out what he was trying to do. He keeps thrusting slowly. Our breathing is getting heavier. I bite my lower lip while he examines my face.  
“How about making our wedding even more interesting?”  
“What’s that?” I moan  
He thrusts a bit faster.  
“Let’s” He pants “Make.. a.. baby” He tries to say between thrusts  
Before I can react, he reaches his peak and withdraws. Exhausted, he lays beside me. I’m too tired to speak for a while. After I realised what he actually said, I smile. We had never talked about having a family but this proved even more how much he loved me. I look at him and lay on top of him. He opens his eyes he had closed and moves my hair away from my face.  
“So you wanted to get me pregnant”  
“Not really sex talk, is it?” He smiles a little “But I love you and I can’t wait to marry you”  
“Oh, Tom. I love you too” I give him a kiss “I can’t wait either”  
“Then let’s do it tomorrow” He’s excited but I stay calm  
“Hold on. We don’t even know if I’m pregnant yet. And besides my family and Clara have planned this forever”  
“Alright. But let this baby thing be our secret for now”  
“Of course” I say and give him one more kiss  
I lay beside him and we fall asleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave a comment below about what you think of the story. Thank you.


End file.
